You might be a pure bookworm, licking a book from the first paragraph to the last. But when it comes to sharing a read with anybody else, who would be better than your significant other?
Often, couple therapists try to resolve weighty relationship issues through various tactics. But the therapy is not supposed to end when you leave the clinic.
There is some homework that both partners have to do to iron out the problems in their relationship. And every other therapist recommends sharing a book so both parties can bring out their indescribable emotions and relate their issues with the text in their hands.
Here we have shortlisted seven books for couples to read together. These are the books from which you’ll both get something out and not just read the words aloud.
(1) The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts
This book explains what can go wrong in a relationship. It has a motto, “Falling in love is easy. Staying in love—that’s the challenge!” that shows its readers how certain love languages can affect a relationship’s success.
We all know communication is the key, but Gary Chapman picked up the five ways you can communicate with your spouse. He means that speaking up a different love language than you’re used to speaking before can keep your love alive.
According to this book, there are five love languages:
(i) Words of affirmation.
(ii) Quality time.
(iii) Receiving gifts.
(iv) Acts of service.
(v) Physical touch.
Everyone somehow responds to all of these, but we all have a primary love language that makes our hearts sing. By knowing it, our partner can better make us feel loved. Also, this book contains a personal assessment to know your partner’s love language.
You should read it together because:
It is one of the best books for couples to read together when it comes to knowing each other’s demands and needs for love.
(2) Getting the Love You Want : A Guide for Couples
Here is another good book for couples to read together. Harville Hendrix has used various personal anecdotes from his two marriages in this book.
Getting the Love You Want addresses that all the issues and conflicts in a relationship have their roots connected to our childhood traumas. And further explains why we have arguments with our spouse and what we actually want from a relationship.
Moreover, from his 30 years of experience, Hendrix explored terminologies like “conscious marriage” and “unconscious marriage” to aid you in eliminating the negativity from your married life.
You should read it together because:
It is a logical and understandable read with practical suggestions that will transform the perspective of the way you take your romantic relationship.
(3) Perfect Love, Imperfect Relationships: Healing the Wound of the Heart
As the name suggests, this book helps couples settle their issues from their relationships by healing their hearts individually. John Welwood will help you understand intimate relationships, and why they are hard. Also, how to make intimate relationships work.
Human beings are complex creatures, especially when it comes to their emotions and feelings. We crave love and to be loved but have major issues when receiving or giving it. The bottom line is that our wounds get in the way of our ability to love and be loved fully.
The basic thing you and your partner will get from this book is that people are wounded and imperfect. And you, as a spouse, have to accept yourself as broken. Ultimately, you need to heal your inner self and love yourself first before you’re ready to receive love from your other half.
You should read it together because:
It’s a classic book for couples to read together. It tells you why you or your mate might be afraid of love and why one of you is too attached or too distant.
(4) Between the World and Me
Another great book for couples to read together that covers several themes, containing racism, fear, systematic oppression, search for identity, father-son relationship, and justice. When you are reading it with your better half, you’ll trace the development of these themes throughout the book.
Actually, Between the World and Me is an essay to Ta-Nehisi Coates’s teenage son. This book brings a powerful message by giving hope to African Americans in their struggle to sustain their culture.
However, reading it with your spouse will help you both consume country matters and let you discuss some intellectual stuff making your bond stronger.
You should read it together because:
It is one of the best books for black couples to read together. It helps you understand why the phrase “black lives matter” is more important than “all lives matter.”
(5) The Normal Bar
Our next pick in the list of books for couples to read together is The Normal Bar. This book is a short and simple read with only 290 pages. Based on the surveys from 100,000 people, it is an ultimate resource for couples who want to dig into their relationship deeply.
The authors come up with both hypothetical and practical data that soothe all the troubles over marriage blunders. It will satisfy you with its inclusive information about what is really going on between you and your significant other.
The Normal Bar reveals the truth to couples about what is normal in a relationship and what is not.
You should read it together because:
It’s a gorgeous read for those who wanna know how to keep relationships in balance.
(6) Attached: Are you Anxious, Avoidant, or Secure?
Attached should be your essential reading to make your attachment more healthy from both sides. This book elaborates Attachment Theory on the basis of romantic relationships. According to the author, there are basically three attachment styles;
(i) Secure.
(ii) Anxious.
(iii) Avoidant.
While reading it with your love, this book won’t make you both feel ashamed about what category you fall into. But the authors help you understand yourself better and guide you to eliminate the root cause of conflicts in your relationship.
The biggest point that most of the readers rave about is that the authors don’t suggest playing hard or making your partner chase you, which most dating counselors advise us to do. Instead, playing hard at the start of the relationship will only attract “avoidants” for “anxious” people.
You should read it together because:
Attached is a magical book for couples to read together if you want to take your attachment style to a more secure side. And make you and your partner get on the same page.
(7) Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love
An eye-opening book that explores the science of relationships and attachments. By reading this book together, you will get the fundamentals of relationships and connections, why we need them, how they work and develop, and how we can build them well.
Sue Jhonson illustrates all these concepts through real and relatable examples she found from her rich experience in clinical psychology. Moreover, this book’s practical exercises will help you learn how to nurture your couplehood and make your love last a lifetime.
The main idea that the author explains in this book is that even adults, all need support and love just like children do. And after parents, we unconsciously expect it from our romantic partners. The heart of the matter in all the chapters is that ‘we simply are people who need people.’ We’d stop being needy in our relationships as soon as we accept that.
You should read it together because:
If you’re a spouse, a girlfriend/boyfriend, or even single, Hold Me Tight is an amazing reader who is there for you with some wisdom and relatable insights.